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主题:【原创】假新闻,真笑话 -- 清嘴小麻籽

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家园 【原创】假新闻,真笑话

已经有人澄清了这是个澳州小伙儿编的假新闻。听起来确实是耸人听闻。问题是为什么很多人都信以为真了呢?答案只有一个:美国人民的数学学得太差。中学的数学课,学生不愿学,老师也怕教。前几天朋友讲了个真故事。说上十年级的女儿天天上数学课看小说,朋友看出苗头找到老师,想来个齐抓共管。怎知老师笑眯眯地讲了一通他做梦也想不到的话:“我希望班上同学个个都能像xx ,她实在是太超前了。我留一节课的作业,xx十分钟就做完了。可是我是不能给她单独布置作业的,这对她太不公平,对其他孩子也不公平。我对xx看小说没有任何意见。我倒是很高兴xx有多样的兴趣”。朋友忧心忡忡地说: “ 女儿的数学其实很一般,比国内上初三的表弟学的还要浅,以后上了大学,可怎么和亚洲来的孩子竞争呢”?

清嘴挠了挠头:“可以培养她当经理嘛,不过别学这宝时捷的傻哥们。 其实学会一句话就够了".

"You do the math".

Porsche dealer - "I got it wrong with the buy one get one free card".

Glen Fergusson - Sales and Marketing manager for a brand new Californian Porsche dealer. Has lost his job and faces possible legal proceedings as the company strives to reclaim the costs of the 18 Porsches given away free under Glen's Opening day "buy one get one free promotion" "I admit I didn't really do the numbers properly on this one" said Glen who told reporters that he had "seen the concept work really well for coffee stores" and in terms of numbers you could argue that Glen's campaign worked. As the new Porsche dealer sold 18 Porsches in the first hour of the store opening.

It took the head office a full hour to realize what was going on and subsequently shut the store.

Local man Bruce Stepper took out a second mortgage on his home after getting a promotional flyer in his mailbox. "I am ecstatic - I brought a shiny red Porsche today, got another one free and I have sold just sold it on EBay, all up I end up getting a Porsche 911 for $5000"

Jane Cameron was arguably even more entrepreneurial. The local Janitor purchased a Porsche using the dealers "no deposit finance plan for low income earners", sold both cars, paid off the finance account and walked away with $120,000 profit. The finance plan was another one of Glen's initiatives that has now been cancelled.

A red faced Glen stated "I have never really been too good at Math and I was sure the whole time we were making money - I was initially blown away by the amount of cars we were selling in that first hour. I had seen the "buy one get one free card" work extremely well for the new coffee shop down the road and thought what a great idea I will try it here."

National spokesman for the dealership chain was quoted as saying "We are just glad that the idiot didn’t have time to run with his 'test drive 5 cars, get one free loyalty stamp card' campaign.

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